Why are we so disconnected from our pelvises?

First up is menstruation and the challenges that can accompany - pain, despair and misery once a month. Along with having to manage a monthly blood flow which increasingly starts at a younger age . It's a lot for an 11yr old to manage within schools that are, on the whole, not menstrual friendly, and within a culture that isn’t menstrual friendly either.   

This disconnection starts before menarche (when the first period comes). We have a different relationship to our sexual genitalia. Boys grow up with their sexual genitalia named and touched from birth, they look down and there it is! This means that their genitalia is neurologically mapped much more than female genitalia. We grow up with shame and taboo messaging circling around our pelvises. 

We experience medical issues within the pelvis , many of them having a debilitating effect on life - endometriosis, adenomyosis, PCOS, PMDD, UTI’s, incontinence, prolapse, vaginismus, dyspareunia (pain during or after sex), chronic pelvic pain, ovarian cysts, vulvodynia…..the list goes on.   

Many of these are not that well known or understood. It can take up to 8 years for a diagnosis for endometriosis and that can come after many years of medical misogynistic gaslighting. We’re starting to realise the full extent and impact there is to decades of medical research biasing the male body and not taking into account the cyclical nature of the female body which has repercussions in the diagnosis and treatment within physical and psychological health. 

I asked a friend the other day ‘why aren’t we connected to our pelvises?”
Her answer was “because most of the time the only connections we have to have our pelvises is through fucking or bleeding”.  The truth can be brutal and heartbreaking. 

I want to change this, and I know you do too. For us, for our sisters and daughters, for the generations coming.